Memories (sometimes called Obituaries)

Some of you who read this blog do not know Mom so we wanted to present some basic facts as well as some memories that get at some of Mom’s character.
Mom was born April 24, 1953 in Grand Rapids, MI while her dad (A. Paul Veenstra) was a seminarian student at Calvin Theological Seminary. She was the first born of Paul and Kathy (Soetenga) Veenstra, and would have three siblings join the family in later years - Randall (Debra) Veenstra, Nancy (Jerry) Wissing – also known as her favorite sister, and Daniel (Lori) Veenstra.
Most of her childhood was spent in Chula Vista, CA, which became a wonderful place to vacation in later years for our family as we spent extended time with grandparents, aunts & uncles, and cousins.
She and Dad met in the bookstore while attending Calvin College. Although they have given us some of these details, we are sure they have not told us everything. They were married on August 15, 1975, and were blessed (Mom’s word) with children within 13 months of marriage. The six of us came in regular succession (two years separating each of us), and in the following order: Jennifer Dawn (AJ) Menefee, Julie Nicole (Joel) VandenBrand, Jillaine Kathryn, Jodi Lyn (Jeremy) Klyn, Jaquelyn Beth, and Jacob Douglas. In later years, she was thrilled with a second chance at (grand)motherhood with the births of Tyler, Eli and Isaac VandenBrand, Declan Klyn, and Quint (Avery John V) Menefee.
Mom was first and foremost a mother, and this mother’s heart extended to all ever considered a friend of one of her children. Her house was an open house. If any friend of her children needed a place to crash, a meal before a game, a place to invite friends, her home was fair game. Even more than her home, she desired to be a mother to all who came under her roof. Phrases we have heard many times since her diagnosis with ALS include the following: “I’ve always considered myself a VanEssen,” or “She was my second mother.” Perhaps one of the saddest days in her life was when her last child left for college.
Her second love was music. God blessed her with a beautiful voice, and she began to use it early in life. She was a part of a singing group in her church in Chula Vista. She continued this use of her gift for music until late 2007 when the ALS began to affect her voice in such a way that she could no longer sing. This presented her with a spiritual dilemma – how could God take this great love away from her? A highlight in her spiritual life was when she would say to the one she served, “God, if you take away even my voice I will serve and love you!” Little did she realize that within 9 months her voice would be gone. Those of you who have followed this blog know that this did not deter her love for Jesus.
In the years after her last child left for college, she struggled with her identity. However, within the latter years came to realize that God was providing wonderful opportunities for her care expressed through mothering to continue to serve Jesus. She began working with the Little Lambs ministry (for pre-school aged children) at Crossroads, and later began working with infants at LaPetite Academy (a childcare provider). Through these God continued to develop compassion within her that extended far beyond her own family.
We, her children, find ourselves overwhelmed with the gift of learning from our mother, and God continues to extend her legacy through us as we raise our children, care for other’s children, and serve in other ways. God gave us a mother of care and love so that we can be those who care and love. For this we will always be grateful, and we cherish those of you who have been touched by her love, often expressed in that wonderful welcoming smile.
We know that even though our mother’s life on this earth ended on Thursday, April 2, 2009, the impact on others continues because she touched and changed us by God’s grace.